Ice Cream and Whores

November 30, 2017

{Verse One}

 

-Defendant-

 

Today – Today – Today is my last day of court

 

My last day as a free man

 

My last day as a sport

 

Continue to call me nice names and down my face, tears will pour

 

I don’t want to be known as a criminal anymore

 

I don’t want to live in a prison cell and be nothing but bored

 

All I want in life is Ice Cream – Ice Cream and Whores

 

Ice Cream and Whores scattered around my front porch

 

I want the things in life that you can’t bring to court

 

Every day I expect a new girl – Every day I expect to score

 

I want these things in life to come forth

 

Ice Cream and Whores will be the name of my “Opening Soon” Liquor store

 

Ice Cream and Whores is the name of the cream you use to get rid of bed sores

 

Ice Cream and Whores, You want it that bad…

 

(Drive North!)

 

That’ll be my slogan of course

 

Because all I want in life is Ice Cream and Whores

 

 

{Chorus One}

 

-Defendant-

 

I scream for Ice Cream – I want Dairy Queen  

 

Yeah, that’s what I need – That’s what I dream

 

Deep down inside of me

 

Ice Cream is what I fiend

 

I want Ice Cream more than anybody

 

Yes, I rest my case – I plead

 

So can I have some, please?

 

(The pound of a Judge’s gavel - twice in a row)

 

I adore a room full of Whores - I want the ones from Jersey Shore  

 

Yeah, I’m one-hundred percent sure - That’s what I’m looking for

 

Down and dirty on the floor

 

Whores are what I like to explore

 

I want Whores more than my perverted mentor

 

Yes, I rest my case – Hardcore

 

So can I have some, pour-favor?

 

(The pound of a Judge’s gavel - twice in a row)

 

{Verse Two}

 

-Judge-

 

Today – Today – Today is your last day of court

 

Your last day for fun and games

 

Your last day to purchase pints or quarts

 

Continue to be wise with me and out of my mouth you’ll hear a roar

 

I don’t want you to be known as a criminal anymore

 

I don’t want you to live in a prison cell while goods you horde

 

Because I know all you want in life is Ice Cream – Ice Cream and Whores

 

Ice Cream and Whores scattered around your front door

 

I know you want the things in life that you can’t bring to court

 

Every day I see you with a new girl – Every day I hear how much you score

 

I know you want these things in life to become your world, Your core

 

Ice Cream and Whores will be the brand of clothing your new cellmate wore

 

Ice Cream and Whores is a brand of Vodka that your new cellmate just poured

 

Ice Cream and Whores, You want it that bad…

 

(Come Forth!)

 

That’ll be the courts slogan of course

 

Because we know all you want in life is Ice Cream and Whores

 

 

{Chorus Two}

 

-Defendant-

 

I scream for Ice Cream – I want Dairy Queen   

 

Yeah, that’s what I need – That’s what I dream

 

Deep down inside of me

 

Ice Cream is what I fiend

 

I want Ice Cream more than anybody

 

Yes, I rest my case – I plead

 

So can I have some, please?

 

(The pound of a Judge’s gavel - twice in a row)

 

I adore a room full of Whores - I want the ones from Jersey Shore

 

Yeah, I’m one-hundred percent sure - That’s what I’m looking for

 

Down and dirty on the floor

 

Whores are what I like to explore

 

I want Whores more than my perverted mentor

 

Yes, I rest my case – Hardcore

 

So can I have some, pour-favor?

 

(The pound of a Judge’s gavel - twice in a row)

 

{Verse Three}

 

-Defendant-

 

Yesterday – Yesterday – Yesterday was my last day of court

 

My last day for walking the streets

 

My last day to eat pork

 

Continue to call me a criminal and with one hit of my fist, I’ll make you snore

 

I don’t want to be known as a criminal anymore

 

I don’t want to live in a prison cell with my cellmate Igor

 

All I want in life is Ice Cream – Ice Cream and Whores

 

Ice Cream and Whores scattered around on my floor

 

I want the things in life that you can’t bring to court

 

Every day I had a new girl – Every day I had to score

 

I miss these things in life that I would consider a chore

 

Ice Cream and Whores will distract the guards, which me they’ll choose to ignore

 

Ice Cream and Whores is a decoy, which I call a metaphor

 

Ice Cream and Whores, You want it that bad…

 

(Join the Force!)

 

That’ll be my slogan of course

 

Because all I want in life is Ice Cream and Whores

 

{Chorus Three}

 

-Defendant-

 

I scream for Ice Cream – I want Dairy Queen   

 

Yeah, that’s what I need – That’s what I dream

 

Deep down inside of me

 

Ice Cream is what I fiend

 

I want Ice Cream more than anybody

 

Yes, I rest my case – I plead

 

So can I have some, please?

 

(The pound of a Judge’s gavel - twice in a row)

 

I adore a room full of Whores - I want the ones from Jersey Shore  

 

Yeah, I’m one-hundred percent sure - That’s what I’m looking for

 

Down and dirty on the floor

 

Whores are what I like to explore

 

I want Whores more than my perverted mentor

 

Yes, I rest my case – Hardcore

 

So can I have some, pour-favor?

 

(The pound of a Judge’s gavel - twice in a row)

 

 

 

 

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